Famous wankers

I've been enjoying this Word website discussion on famous people who are abject tools in real life:

/www.wordmagazine.co.uk/content/famous-people-you-have-met-who-are-wankers

Being a generally good natured forum it also includes plenty on very nice celebs (for example: "Michael Caine was nice as pie when my son (then 3) wee'd on his shoes in Harrods.  MC said "never mind son" in his very best Alfie voice and wiped his expensive loafers down with some toilet roll"). 

Worth a read if you're bored - given that you're reading this blog you must almost be at the sewing-name-tags-into-your-socks stage already.  A few choice samples:

• I witnessed Jeremy Clarkson reduce a pretty young sales girl to tears when she could not supply him with what he was asking for immediately.  It was awful.  It wasn't so much what he said, but the way he said it. His face contorted in that horrid, condescending, smug little snarl he has.
  
• My colleague Jane was responsible for two Morrissey album campaigns - marketing, promo etc.  She was a lifelong fan, but remained professional and scrupulous about every aspect of the campaign, accompanying him to interviews, attending to his every need - of which there were very many.
  
  Moz appeared on Friday Night with Jonathan Ross, his first TV interview for years and years.  This was A Big Deal.  Ross interviews each guest for a good 45 minutes or so, which is then cut down to bitesize for broadcast.  For 35 of his alloted 45, Morrissey, bizarrely, laid in to David Bowie, denouncing him as a fake, a sell-out, a has-been, a charlatan.  This saw to discomfit Ross, he being a lifelong Bowie obsessive.  Indeed, it appeared to be a tactic or strategy on Morrissey's part, for God knows why.  The remaining 10 minutes were full of nothing very much but uncomfortable pauses, ums and ahs.  The resulting broadcast interview, culled solely from those 10 minutes, was an embarrassing disaster.
  
  Returning to the green room, Jane sought to reassure the clearly disturbed Morrissey, offering Don't worries and It'll be fines, etc.
  
  Next morning at the office, Jane received a fax from Morrissey (he communicated mostly via fax) 'Jane, I bombed last night and you weren't man enough to tell me.  I think it would be best if we don't see each other again.'  To say Jane was upset would be something of an understatement.  Nice bloke.
• At a cricket match in Weston Supermare a young boy spots John Cleese sitting in a deck chair enjoying the day's sport apparently unrecognised by those around him.  The boy approaches and asks for an autograph. JC leans in close and whispers "What happens next is not your fault".  JC then stands up and gives the boy two minutes of the full Basil Fawlty righteous indignation and furious anger.  Arm waving, who do you think you are, I only came to watch the cricket in peace, the full package.  Those around watch in stunned silence at this appalling behaviour.  When he had finished JC leant in close to the boy again and whispered "Thanks, no-one will bother me for the rest of the match now", signed the autograph and returned to his seat.